Tougher than......

 
Yep! Here he is pre-transfusion in his Sesame Street pjs. We did it! He did great! He was such a good baby today. He just walked around checking things out. There were alot of "No No's" in his reach and he touched none! I could hardly believe it! My sweet mom went with me today, since Bryan was out of town. She was a TON of help. After our 1 1/2 hour trip, we finally arrived. They took us straight back and got ready to do the IV. He cried, but stopped as soon as they stopped poking at him with sharp objects. They took some blood and we waited... A substitute doctor saw us, and was FABULOUS! Me thinky, me gonna be requesting a change. She said that they were doing a test to determine if his blood cell maker was producing any cells at all. I asked her what she was comparing it to. She told me that the other doctor had done one too. (It would have been nice if that doctor had shared the info with me). And then, we waited... She said that if it showed any activity, that she would not transfuse him. And then we waited...The test came back and was a big fat ZILCHO. I was kinda torn though. I wanted him to not need the transfusion, but had accepted it in my heart, so I had some mixed feelings. I had painted a picture in my mind of him with beautiful pink glowing skin and lots of energy. I knew that God had heard my prayer for no transfusion, I just wondered if He was just checking to see if I believed. And then we waited... They came and drew more blood to make sure that my blood and his were compatible. And then we waited... After WAITING, we started the transfusion, which lasted about 2-3 hours. He slept through the whole thing! My mom and I caught up on some HGTV while my little angel, slept on my chest. (I still can't believe that I forgot my camera. I guess that I had some more important things to think about.) He got his IV out and away we went. He will have his level checked Wednesday. I am praying that he will be making his own cells. The transfusion does not stimulate him, it only buys us some time. The MD said that even when he starts to make cells, he will be pale for about 6 more months, so don't adjust your screen contrast, that is his REAL color. The doctor said something as we were getting ready to leave that I had thought about too. She said, "Just think, you got to give LIFE to your child twice!" I felt proud of my Bryce and how well he had behaved and received the blood. What a tough guy! He is tougher than....tougher than....yea! He is tougher than WOODPECKER LIPS! lol

My Tough Guy

 
(Sorry that I don't have more words for now). Today we learned that Bryce was 2 points lower, after two needle sticks. The specialist recommended the transfusion, since he is sleeping a little more than usual. She and I both did not want for Bryce to get into any distress, so tomorrow he will get 4 oz. of my blood. Bryan (my husband) had to go out of town with his job. My mom will be going with us. I dread the sticks (more labwork and the IV) more than the actual transfusion. He is tough though. He did not even cry today with the first stick. The second one, he had big crocodile tears and hardly a whimper. My tough boy.....I love you!

Photo Blurb Book

This photo is for an entry for one of my favorite blog sites called iheartfaces. They are requesting your favorite photo for a book. The pic always has to include a face. Although, I do not consider myself a "professional", I have been paid for my work and have to enter the "professional category". This is one of my many favorites of my "little angel's" face. That SMILE melts me. It is BIGGER than any problem that I can possibly "think" that I have! lol It was my banner photo for a while. It is my desktop photo now. How can I look at it and NOT smile? Please click on it to enjoy the life-size version.

 

Head on over to iheartfaces and checkout all the favorites. Enter one for yourself, I would love to see it!


"I am submitting this photo into the www.iheartfaces.com Blurb Book photo contest. I am granting I ♥ Faces permission to use my photo in a printed version of a book for commercial use and possibly advertising of a photo book on both the Blurb and I ♥ Faces web sites."

My Little Airplane Mechanic

 
I took this photo of Bryce, a week or so ago, while we were playing outside. (i.e.-trying to forget about worrying) He was playing with his Elmo airplane, that my parents gave him for his birthday. It is a really cute toy. He is already "fixing" everything. Now, if he would just get to work on this "blood issue". I LOVE his little curl, hanging out from under his hat in the back. Yesterday and today, he has not been himself. I think that he is growing more tired. He isn't laughing as much, he isn't smiling as much, he is playing in spurts, not doing much though, he is whining alot more, and he is so pale that the skin around his eyes are purple. We have another blood test on Tuesday. We will find out the results Tuesday also. I probably won't hear from the specialist until Wednesday (unless his levels are critical). My blood should be ready for him, by Wednesday or Thursday. I am anxious to know where he is at since he is acting different. It is strange to have to wait for things like this. I want to RUN and say, "FIX HIM. He should not be this way!" He is normally such a good baby. I feel like he thinks that we are punishing him. Tuesday come quick!

Today....

 
Today, I held my baby while they stuck a needle in his arm for the 3rd time in 7 days. Today, I listened to him whimper like a puppy while they moved the needle around trying to find what he doesn't have. Today, I watched, while the vein, gave no more, and his tiny pale arm, turned purple as the needle burst the vein. Today, I listened while the doctor told me, "It's 2 points lower than before". Today, I learned that he is now 4 points away from a transfusion. Today, I waited ALL day for a call from a specialist that NEVER came. Today, I hid my tears, so no strangers, that I passed, saw my pain. Today, I felt a pulling from my knotted stomach, to my heart in my throat. Today, I held him for his nap, instead of placing him in his crib, to get "things" done. Today, I laid with his smiling face touching mine and stared at his dreamy blue eyes. Today, I savored every, laugh, squeal and "momma" that his beautiful lips could make. Today, I felt alone, because I can't make it "better" and I am his mommy! Today, I prayed for healing, that I cannot control. Today, I needed to trust God, because Bryce belongs to Him. Today........
Tomorrow.....
Tomorrow, I will give my blood, to have incase God needs it for my son. Tomorrow, I will pray for a Will that might not be my own. Tomorrow, I will be thankful, and praise God for all He has done. Tomorrow, I will be stronger, because I am... the mom....HIS mom....BRYCE'S MOM!...tomorrow

"Then it went POW!"

WARNING! LONG POST! CONTINUE AT YOUR OWN RISK! This post will contain bad grammer, spelling, many "run-on"sentences, weird punctuation and is guaranteed to be hard to follow, so continue with caution...

This has been an eventful couple of days. It started Wednesday night. I was going to try to get a pic of Bryce in his cowboys boots with a naked bum. He was in a grumpy mood, so I was hurrying to set up my umbrella lights and camera (which I never do, cause it is such an event, but you cannot have a bad shadow on a booty picture . It might scar him for life!). I am still very much an amateur. I was plugging in stuff and plugged my cord (that syncs the lights to the camera) into the wall instead of the light box. Then I pressed the shutter to test the lights , with a stool for a prop, since Bryce was in the tub. And then it went POW! This beautiful image is untouched....lol. Smoke and all.


The camera still works for natural light ( I so want to get better at that, but this wasn't what I had in mind.) needless to say...no pics. My camera will be sent to Canon to see if it can even be fixed tomorrow. HO! HUM! I was glad that my husband was with Bryce, watching him in the tub, cause we are one of those weird couples that laugh when something scares the other one. I bet I jumped 10 feet in the air. I wonder if I had a black ring around my eye, like with those old trick cameras. Later, as I finally fell asleep, Bryce woke up at 2:30am, and for the life of me, I couldn't get him back to sleep. His daddy usually does the "getting up at night thing", cause if I exit the bed for any other reason than a trip to the potty, I can't go back to sleep and lay there staring at the ceiling with my mind racing about EVERYTHING (like how I blew up my camera!) He whispered to me that he was exhausted, so off I went. Needless to say, I got Bryce to sleep and layed him down and his head popped up and the crying began again. (My best guess is that it was a night terror, cause he doesn't usually do this. He meant business that he WAS NOT TO BE LEFT ALONE in this room with ELMO eyes staring at him from his bookcase). So, the next morning, he decides to wake a whole 2 hours earlier than usual. (In case I missed him.) He had already spent the majority of the night in our bed, sitting up, talking his garble talk and trying to see what he could see in the dark. Let me first say that, although we love to cuddle, my husband and I are not fans of our baby being in our bed at nightime, because this usually results in knees and elbows to places that we won't mention. The next morning, Bryan was off to work and I was off to take the phone off the hook. Bryce and I decided, well I decided, that I should lay back down for an hour or so. Bryce gave in and slept with me. When we woke up, my cell phone had about 15 calls from my husband and a couple from my pediatrician. I called my husband, and he began telling me to call the doctor, that something was wrong with Bryce's labwork on a minor follow-up. So, the plot thickened. DA DA DUM! I tried to reach our pediatrician. You know how that is, everybody must be calling when you are. About 4-5 hours later he called back. He told me that we were to go to Children's Hospital the next day because Bryce had stopped making Red Blood Cells. My heart sank! He explained that he checked a level at his 12 month checkup, as a routine, and it was borderline. The 6 week follow-up, was significantly lower. ( I won't even bore you with the details of the headache of trying to get the appointment, with the specialist, on short notice). My MD's office was great at helping us. So, today, off we went an hour and a half away to get him stuck for more tests. I had not slept well, and despite our best efforts, we were 30 minutes late. I HATE BEING LATE! We went to the desk of our appt. They, then sent us immediately for lab work. We got to the lab, and NO LIE, it was on FIRE! They had to call a fire truck and sent us to another lab. We arrived at the other lab, and finally got called back. We had a timid, young, lab person. She was taking her sweet time getting set up, and then it hit me. (This is a learning hospital). SHE WAS A STUDENT! My mind was saying, "practice on me! not my baby!" I AM an advocate for letting people learn, but not today, and not now. I kept my cool, and decided to give her a chance. I REPEAT "ONE CHANCE". She looked at veins and moved the tourniquet around, then said, "I will be right back." Here is where is gets kinda funny. I can hear her in the other room talking, she said,"Now, how old is he?" The other person said, "Are you gonna be alright honey?" I knew that this might get a little ugly. Well, after her awkwardness and moving the needle around in his arm, she got it. YAY, NEW GIRL! We saw the doctor later and (off course) Bryce fell asleep before she could examine him. She said that he has something called, TEC, or Transient Erythroblastopenia of children. Ok., so in English, it is a rare thing, that happens sometimes, after a virus, where their bodies quit producing RBCs. In 120 days, your body replaces the total amount of cells that you have. The specialist commended our doctor for finding the problem. She said that she sees most kids after they are already needing a transfusion and very sick. Pray that his "cell maker" will kick on, before he needs a transfusion. So, he dropped 6 points in 6 weeks. He is 6 points away from needing a transfusion. He will have arm sticks once a week until it resolves. YAY! NOT! She was reassuring that it does resolve whenever Bryce's body decides to start making cells again. A little scary though! So, on another note, my dear husband has, what I like to call George Bush disease (this is where you use words incorrectly or abbreviations wrong). We laugh about it all the time! When he was trying to make sense of the pediatrician's phone call yesterday, they were discussing the RSV (bad kid virus) that Bryce had had in January. Bryan said, "Yea, he had that bad HPV (a sexually transmitted disease) in January". Our pediatrician, said, "You might not want to get those 2 mixed up." lol Bryan was so embarrased. He didn't even know what HPV was. I had to tell him. I can't say that I would have known either, if I weren't a nurse. So, Bryce was a total CHAMP today. He never whimpered or cried, except with the blood draw. What a total ANGEL! We saw such sick kids today and counted our blessings. I will post some pics that I made today of him with my little "diaper bag camera", since I blew up the other one. I am thinking that tomorrow will be a better day. "Thank You God for your wonderful Protective Hand, and for showing us that things will always be just things (my camera), and LIFE will ALWAYS be LIFE! Thank You for our health and for the abundance of JUST YOU LORD. AMEN

Photo Contest- Hats

This week's photo contest topic is "Hats". Bryce has lots of cute ones. We put them on him when he was really little and he will usually wear them pretty well. These two pics came to mind as "different" than what others might post. Unfortunately, they were shot with my "point and shoot" camera (also known as the "diaper bag camera"). The first one is my entry for the kid category. It is Bryce at 7 months with his cousin's Davey Crockett hat on. I know... I know... jokes about being from Alabama and road kill and wearing possums and creatures on our head fall here. _________________(P.S.-It is very hard to say Davey Crockett without singing the song..lol)
 

The second one is my entry for adult. (I know, little man is in it too. But, what pic do I have that he is not in?) It is Bryce's Great Grandpa McEwan. He and Great Grandma came for a visit. He ALWAYS wears his Navy hat proudly. I thought that it only fitting for Bryce to "represent" for his dad and get his Marine Corp hat on too.
 
These pics were both good for a laugh or two for us. We hope that you enjoyed them too. Head on over to iheartfaces.com and check out the other hats that are sure to be SILLY!!!!!